Day n' Nite

I think things are pretty much over if I seriously feel this way.

Finally

All those years, I held a grudge on how they could just leave an give up on me like that. Why were they so hard on me and more importantly, why did I live this life with little to no shame?

Then the time came for me to be put in their shoes and everything clicked as I was sent back to Kansas.

It HURTS to see the one you love in unworthy situations and of course later on, you have to continue on seeing them just have to repeat their mistakes. Once caught red-headed, they rub and turn the guilt towards you. After lecture blooming into a fight, then blossoming into a makeup, a promise to be broken falls from that tree of false hope. This cycle commences for so long until the visualizer becomes so devastedly frustrated and that they just can't keep on looking at the gory like nothing. They soon start to turn their heads as energy is drained from them and the only option is to crawl towards the beaming sun of recovery and acceptance of a loss.

I have to admit I am frustrated over my possible limit, but I'm stubborn and too heavy-hearted. So God, please help and give me the strength and courage to make it through this thorn-riddened obstacle. I'll keep on trying.

I hate that I love.

Love

It's a universal topic. Is there a what-so-ever important use of Valentine's day? I think we should celebrate Valentine's day by loving ourselves, first.

There's been several times I've encountered love and each time was brought to me perfectly corner wrapped in both immense joy and then, absolute sorrow.

I would describe myself as feeling heavily famished with hollowness right now, but it's not an unhappy feeling. I contently feel sure about myself.

I know that everything is going to be okay.

He loves me and I love him. Therefore, I trust in God.

Don't ever think you're alone, because you're not.

You have me and him.


At first, I was sad because I missed you so. Of course, I still do. However, my heart is at rest now because I realized that love we have for each other will always be around. I may be sorry that things didn't go quite right the first time and that no second chances have sprung, but it's okay. Even with the distance and the inconsistent phone calls and text messages, I know that everything will still be set in place when we meet again the next time. If it's meant to be, it will fall together and I can't say it will for sure, but I hope it does. So, I'm okay with us doing our own thing for how long this time-being will take place. We're spreading our wings, but when the horizon sets, we'll be in motion together.