All those years, I held a grudge on how they could just leave an give up on me like that. Why were they so hard on me and more importantly, why did I live this life with little to no shame?
Then the time came for me to be put in their shoes and everything clicked as I was sent back to Kansas.
It HURTS to see the one you love in unworthy situations and of course later on, you have to continue on seeing them just have to repeat their mistakes. Once caught red-headed, they rub and turn the guilt towards you. After lecture blooming into a fight, then blossoming into a makeup, a promise to be broken falls from that tree of false hope. This cycle commences for so long until the visualizer becomes so devastedly frustrated and that they just can't keep on looking at the gory like nothing. They soon start to turn their heads as energy is drained from them and the only option is to crawl towards the beaming sun of recovery and acceptance of a loss.
I have to admit I am frustrated over my possible limit, but I'm stubborn and too heavy-hearted. So God, please help and give me the strength and courage to make it through this thorn-riddened obstacle. I'll keep on trying.
I hate that I love.
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